Breakups hurt, losing a job hurts, leaving a loved one hurts, and even not being able to taste the cake of your favorite flavor, hurts!
Looking for inner peace? Does it sound like a wild goose to chase? Let me tell you one thing, before finding contentment, first of all, you need to accept that there’s no such thing as absolute peace or absolute sorrow. Achieving inner peace doesn’t mean you are free from every discomfort or unpleasant circumstance. It’s just achieving a state of calm where, when life throws a curveball, you will be comfortable enough to knock it out of the park. Maybe you are at peace, but still, you can experience dismay, sorrow or the bitter side of life. Inner peace is not always connected to what’s happening around you, it’s more like attaining happiness, containment and bliss no matter how difficult things get in your life.
In this article, I am going to share some easy ways that can bring a little more peace to your heart.
Accept what you can’t change and focus on what you can change
You maybe the most generous person, but still, people can throw dirt on your name. You may work hard on your new project, but still, your teammate can get all the applause. You maybe the most loyal person on the earth, but you can still get cheated on. So now the question is, in any of these situations, were you the one at fault? And the answer is, No.
When we experience any undesirable situation, we always get trapped in the loop of “why me”, “ how”, and “what if”. But that’s the flow of life. No matter how hard you try, there will always be situations, you can’t change. The first step towards inner peace is accepting things as they are.
Ultimately, acceptance is about surrendering to the flow of life and trusting the process. I know, it is not as easy as it sounds, and it is ok not to feel okay. It’s very natural to feel bad or miserable. Acknowledge your emotions, respect them but don’t let them linger for months or years. Feel what you need to feel, and then let it go. Trust me, once you learn to let anything go, you will be surprised to feel the tranquility in your heart that you always crave. Someone told me once that, if it’s not going to affect you after 5 years, then don’t let it stress you for even 5 minutes now. And I loved that idea.
Do you know what is the best part of this process? While there are many things beyond your control, there are also things you can influence. Instead of stressing over what you can’t change, focus on what you can change. Redirect your energy towards these areas and free your heart from any unnecessary damage that it doesn’t deserve.
Cultivate gratitude
Your feelings are valid and life is certainly hard and times can seem completely unfair but just remember that, things can be worse. When you wake up, count at least three things you are grateful for outside of your current situation. Take time to reflect on what you are thankful for, whether it’s the beauty of nature, the love of friends and family or the simple pleasure of everyday life. Life is too short to cry about what’s wrong and not recognize all the beautiful things and people around you. Every time you feel a wave of negative emotions coming up, practice gratitude for what you already have and you will find how fast it shifts your focus from what’s lacking to what’s abundant, fostering a sense of contentment and peace.
Believe in a power bigger than you
I always believe whatever happens, happens for a reason. Whatever religious belief you practice, just remember that God is always there watching for you. We plan a lot of things, sometimes it goes according to our plan and sometimes it doesn’t. Whenever something undesirable happens, I always try to console myself by saying that it was god’s plan and it was for the best. Trust him and see how things unfold. Believing you’ll find what’s meant for you and god will never leave you alone, will pour your heart with calm and serenity during the hardest storms of life.
Express your thoughts
Free your thoughts by expressing them to anyone or anything. Talk to your best friend, write in your journal, paint it, sing it or whatever you can do. The fact is when we can’t free our thoughts, they just linger around our minds and give us anxiety.
Give yourself a treat
Eat your favorite ice cream, go shopping, watch your favorite TV series or movies, or just do whatever makes you happy. In this busy world, sometimes we become so workaholics that we just forget to take care of ourselves. But we need to understand that even these small things matter. These can bring joy to your heart and fade your stress and negative thoughts.
Forgive
Indeed, forgiving the person who did the worst to you is not easy. But feeding the anger will not do any good to you either. Negative thoughts will not let your mind calm. You can’t change others’ actions toward you, But you can change your response. Learn to forgive and let yourself free from the burden of all the negativity. You may get hurt but you can also console yourself that you didn’t hurt anyone, and you will find yourself more tranquil and blissful.
Practice self-care
First, identify all the things that you want from others. Love, validation, kindness, acceptance, respect whatever it is, learn to give it to yourself. Remember if you don’t know how to give it to yourself, you will feel helpless every time someone else misbehaves with you. Practice self-care through meditation, physical exercise or whatever is required for your wellbeing, just be gentle and compassionate to yourself and it will give you the power to remain unaffected by your surroundings.
Spend time in nature
I don’t know why and how every time I get surrounded by nature, I feel an instant calm and bliss in my heart. You can go for a walk in the woods, on the beach or anywhere far from the regular noise, it will help to lower your stress level and fill your heart with serenity.
Smile as much as you can
Did you hear the saying, Laughter is the best medicine? I am not going to tell you to laugh loudly all the time, But you may wear a smile on your face. Just a simple smile can bring out a positive vibe even in the toughest situation. It will lower your stress hormone, add joy to your life, reduce anxiety, spread positivity, and will be enough to soothe your heart.
Help others
Helping someone is not necessarily in just any materialistic way, it can be as simple as listening to someone without judgement, offering a solution, giving mental support or anything that can make them happy. And at the end of the day, It will make you feel better to contribute to others’ happiness and favor you to cultivate peace from within.
Final words
There’s no one-size-fits-all step to finding inner peace. Have faith and know that all our hardships are temporary. Just try not to be hard on yourself. Do what can bring serenity to your heart and bloom like a flower blossom through concrete.
